Choosing a Psychotherapist
Choosing a therapist is a very important decision as therapy involves a significant investment of time and financial resources not to mention entrusting someone with your private feelings and thoughts, your hopes and your fears, and your emotional well-being. If your therapist were a medication intended to influence what you think, believe, feel and do, you would learn about it thoroughly before you took it.
Therapist referral sources
There are a variety of ways to obtain therapist referrals. Some people prefer to get referrals from friends or a physician while others prefer the privacy of online therapist directories and web searches. Some use both, going online to obtain additional information about therapists whose names that they receive from friends, physicians, insurance panels, or other sources.
Meet in person for a consultation
The best - and really the only - way to choose a therapist is by meeting with them to determine if that person and their style of working feels like a good fit for you. A therapist who comes highly recommended by a friend or Yelp may or may not be a good match for you. Similarly, reading about someone's approach to therapy on the Internet is not the same as experiencing what it is like to work with them.
Finding a good fit
Finding a therapist with whom you have a good match or fit means feeling a reasonably comfortable connection with them where you feel accepted and understood. It’s normal to feel anxious and not totally comfortable when meeting with a therapist for the first time. You should have a sense though that over time, as more trust develops that you could feel safe enough to share and explore more vulnerable feelings and aspects of yourself.
Clinical research indicates that the quality of relationship that a client establishes with a therapist is what most determines the success of a psychotherapy treatment. So even if it means having to meet with more than one therapist, it will likely be worth the investment.
Consider checking out multiple therapists
Seeking additional consultations with other psychotherapists can provide a point of comparison and help you make a more educated decision. It is often less confusing if you contact one therapist at a time and evaluate how working with that therapist feels to you. You may be able to make a determination fairly quickly or it may take a few sessions to decide. You should give honest feedback to your therapist, including asking questions if you have them, and see how you feel about the discussion that follows. If the fit doesn’t feel right or you aren’t sure, you should try another therapist.
Location, time & fee
Given that it is impossible to predict how long you might want to stay in therapy, you should find a therapist in a location that is convenient for you who can offer you a time and a fee that you can manage in an ongoing way.
Evening appointments
On a practical note, you may need to contact several therapists to find one with openings at times that fit with your schedule. This is especially the case if you need an evening appointment which are in high demand and can be more difficult to find.
It might feel discouraging to have to contact multiple therapists, especially when you’re in distress. Many therapists appreciate this and if they can’t accommodate you, try their best to provide you with names of colleagues who might be a good fit for you based on what you tell them about yourself and your needs. Sometimes these recommendations can be quite helpful.
Click here or on the links to the left for additional Resources about the different kinds of therapy, identifying potential therapists, and beginning and financing therapy.